Tuesday, January 5, 2010
It's Tuesday! Yay! Sentences!
I've taken a bit of a break from the Two Sentences Tuesdays, but I'm pleased to say I haven't taken a break from writing. Well, editing really. I'm nearly finished fixing the obvious errors in my vampire western. Soon I'll run out a hard copy and find what else is wrong with it.
It should be fun.
I'm currently reading a fantasy novel by Mercedes Lackey from her Elemental Masters series. It's No. five. I haven't read the other four, but I may have to now.
Here are two sentences from it.
In this scene the main character, and her maid, and the creature that lives in her kitchen have trapped a homunculus.
"Limping slightly, the cat leaped out the window, leaving the two young women and the brownie staring at one another.
'Well,' Ninette said, finally. 'Do you think we ought to put more heavy things on top of the pot?'
-Reserved for the Cat, Mercedes Lackey (Daw Books, Inc. 2007)
Here's a bit from my recent foray into correcting.
From Biting the Dust:
"Part of her wanted to hold Jemima Clayton and the other longed to sink her fangs into the beautiful slender neck and drink. Holding Jemima meant she'd be consumed by her. The other way meant she'd consume Jemima. Desire and death.
'Kiss or bite,' she muttered. She turned Hades to the valley and rode."
For more, or to participate, please see the Women of Mystery.
Thanks for reading.
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13 comments:
Consume is one of those power words that really put descriptive bite into a vampire western.
Love the lines.
And am really looking forward to reading your vampire western!
Thanks so much, David. *descriptive bite* love it.
dfBag Lady, you will, you will.
I don't think I can eat David's comment, I mean, beat.
A vampire western!
I really have to see your books on my shelf someday.
Leah, the rest of that ML series is just as good. I'm with David on the use of 'consume' well said.
Clare, you made me laugh. Thanks.
Messymimi, I want to see that, too.
Reb, good to know. I'm quite enjoying this one. Thanks re: 'consume.'
df Leah,
Amazing indecision!!
Terrie
df Terrie, thanks so much.
Sounds like you're moving right along with your vampire westering. Great title and intriguing sentences. I'm looking forward to more. :)
It's coming along, Hilary. Thanks.
I love it! "She turned Hades to the valley and rode..."
What was in that pot??
Nancy, thanks.
The captured Homunculus was in the pot.
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