Tuesday, August 30, 2011

If At First You Don't Succeed...

Dear Scammer:
If you are going to hose people, then at least have the decency to learn the language. You can catch more flies with proper grammar.
As opposed as I am to your operation, I feel I must tell you this.

Oh, and for dog's sake, lay off the exclamation points.
They are irritating as hell.

As Ever,
Not Replying To Your Email

Windows Live Team Account Alert!!!

This  email from Windows Live Customer Service® and we are sending  it to all account user for safety. Due to the anonymous registration of our account which is causing congestion to our service, so we are shutting down some account and your account was among those to be deleted. The purpose of this email is for you to verify that you are the owner of this account and you are still using it by filling the information below after clicking on the reply button:

Username: ……………………..
Password: …………………….

Date of Birth: …………………
Country or Territory: …………
Make sure the details above are correct to enable us restore your account details, this will help prevent your account from been suspended.

Users have often told us that the more they use Windows Live! Service, the more they discover its benefits. We'll keep working on making Windows Live! the best email service around, and we appreciate your joining us for the ride.Sincerely,

Microsoft Corporation

One Microsoft Way

Redmond, WA 98052

Potential victim's note:
I had to reduce the size of the screaming red alert banner else it wouldn't show all three exclamation points.


Dawn said...

Nice one, Leah. (I would have put an exclamation point in there but I'm feeling a little self-conscious about them this morning.)

I get spam where they're so dim that they forget to put in the link they wanted me to use. (I would have put an exclamation point in there too.)

What the heck - I can't help myself!!!!

Leah J. Utas said...

Dawn, you can use all the exclamation points you want here. I was referring to their use in what is supposed to be a professional/business email.

I love your dim spammers.

Shrinky said...

They've taken to phoning us over here.

Scammer (in a very strong, almost undecipherable accent: "Ma-am, this is Cherl, from Micosoft head office, we are contacting you because your computer is under a severe threat. Is your computer switched on? I need to talk you through several steps to make it safe.."

Me: You are not called Cheryl. I know this because I am a witch. I do not need your name, or to know who you are, because I have your voice now. You poor thing, you are evil, so I must curse you now to die a horrible d"

Phone goes dead.

Ah well.

Leah J. Utas said...

Shrinky, I love it. Great response. If they call me, then I just may do something similar.

David Cranmer said...

These spammers are a waste of skin.

messymimi said...

Always makes me wonder how many of the world's problems would be solved if these people would try to do good in the world instead.

Yeah, i know, that's too much work for them, they would rather steal. Ugh.

Leah J. Utas said...

They sure are, David.

I wonder, too, Messymimi.

Hilary said...

I got the same kind of phone call that Shrinky did a short while ago. I let him tell me that I have a virus on my computer. I asked him why he thought so. As proof, he wanted me to confirm that it's running slowly. I told him "I can't do that."

He tried another approach, telling me that my computer is very vulnerable to hackers. I told him that this just can't be. He said that it is!!!! (he had exclamation points in his voice).

After about 5 minutes of talking in circles, he asked me to go to my computer and I told him I couldn't do that. He wanted to know why not? I told him that I didn't have a computer.


"You don't have a computer?"


click!!! (the exclamation points were implied)

Frank asked me why I didn't just hang up on him at the start.

Duh.. this was much more fun. ;)

the Bag Lady said...

Hilary's comment cracked me up! I would never have thought to do that.... but I will now!! (oh, look! Exclamations points!!)

Leah J. Utas said...

Hilary, you're my hero.

Bag Lady, !!!!!!

Dawn said...

Oh I am SO Sick of getting this too!!!!!!!!!
They also need spell check on their computer.

(In response to your question on my post....the Trail Race was on Moose Mountain, just outside of Bragg Creek. Highly recommend the hiking trails there.)

Leah J. Utas said...

Yes, they do, Dawn. Thanks for telling me where you were.