Sunday, May 25, 2008

Living Better Through Chemistry

Your thyme will come...

Warning: The following contains sarcasm. If you are sarcasm –challenged, then please know this means the literal interpretation of the words as rendered below is not the true intent of the piece.
Thank you,
The Management

How lucky we are in Canada. We had a federal government who cares so deeply for us that it is going to make it harder for us to get all those nasty, nasty natural health products.
Bill C-51 has passed second reading already and it was only introduced last month. Why, it usually takes months and months for a bill to be passed. This one is being fast-tracked so any product deemed illegal under its provisions can be removed from the shelves right away for our own good.

As a thoughtful, caring government, the Conservatives have included a provision allowing for agents to swoop in to health food stores and seize inventory. And best of all, the government doesn’t have to worry itself sick about compensating any of the businesses. We get consumer protection and taxpayer protection! All in one bill!

Our Conservative federal government has thoughtfully secured the market for pharmaceuticals. These drugs have been tested and re-tested and all the facts found during the tests are released to the public so informed decisions are made.
Why, all those thousands of years of herbal use really cannot and must not measure up to the few years of clinical trials. We really do live better through chemistry and our government knows it.

Why, yes. Yes, I do love Big Brother.

8 comments:

Frank Baron said...

Sounds like major pressure from the pharmaceutical and food industries was brought to bear here. They've had to list ingredients and provide consumer warnings for years and want to share the pain with their rivals.

Penelope said...

Wow, the blood sucking pharmecutical lobby is sticking it to the herbals (at least in Canada).

I was wondering when this would happen . . .

Give it time. It will happen to your neighbors to the south.

Karen

Leah J. Utas said...

Hello Frank,

I didn't think about the food industry angle on this. Bet you're absolutely right.

Penelope, that's very true. Herbs can't be patented so Big Pharmas can't own them so it wants to make them suffer instead.

Get your herbals while you can, neighbour.

the Bag Lady said...

Frank said it best - share the pain!
It was only a matter of time. And, yes, it will probably happen in the States, too. The only unusual thing is that we usually follow the American's lead, not the other way around.

Leah J. Utas said...

dfBag lady - It is interesting how our Paternalistic New Government seems to be doing something the US didn't do first.

Thomma Lyn said...

Oh, ugh -- I could really get on my soapbox about Big Brother and Nanny States. And yes, corporatization feeds into this, too, I'm sure.

Reb said...

Well, it's about thyme, what are they going to do to all the people that grow rosemary for luck and belladonna for a sleep aid? Sage words from Frank, I think he has the right of it. Next thing you know it'll be illegal to grow poppies in your yard. Oh, right, well then.

Leah J. Utas said...

TL, feel free to get on the soapbox here anytime you like.

Reb, it's to the point we should be kissing their feet for allowing us to have a garden.